I want to first remind you that I love you very much, and that I think you’re an amazing human being – even if you drive me crazy most days. I’m sure I bug you to pieces most of the time too. 🙂
This morning you came to me upset because your brother had picked up your pencil and was using it. “He stole it!!!” is how you informed me of the problem. My response, that someone can’t steal an item you choose to give, didn’t exactly impress you.
You were pretty annoyed that I didn’t seem to care about your pencil or how your rights to said pencil had been violated. It probably seemed that your cares weren’t important while I was letting your brother get away with terrible offenses. Again.
The truth is, I was saying that you’re important. Terribly important, as a matter of fact.
It doesn’t matter whether you have the pencil of your choosing or another one from the drawer.
What does matter is your heart. If it’s full of kindness and mercy, then I’ll see that in your behavior. I’ll see you prioritizing…putting the needs (and even wants) of others above your own.
I know that this really doesn’t make sense to you today, and that this lesson is one that you have to learn on your own over time. I hope though, that you come back and read this letter someday and can understand why your old mom doesn’t care about pencils.
I love you, buddy.
Earnest Parenting: help for parents who need to teach about selfishness.