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Encouraging Heroes. You can be one too.

More than half of all marriages in this country end in divorce, and a large number of couples now opt to live together without exchanging vows.

When you go through a divorce, you will likely feel hurt and have problems functioning, but you need to realize that your children feel the same way.

They miss your spouse as much as you do, and they often blame themselves for the divorce or break up. Restoring the balance in a broken home isn’t easy, but it is something you need to do.

One on One Time
You divorced because you and your partner no longer loved each other, no longer communicated or had problems getting along, but you need to make it clear that it wasn’t because of your kids. Both you and your former spouse should commit to spending time with your kids on a one on one basis.

You might attend your son’s basketball game one week, while your spouse attends the next week’s game, or you might agree to do things with your children on alternate weekends.

Family and Individual Counseling
If you and your partner attending marriage counseling sessions, you probably talked more about your relationship than you did your kids. After the divorce, it’s important that you get your kids the counseling that they need, which typically involves family counseling.

You and your partner can attend the sessions with your kids or you can alternate sessions. You also need to cope with your own feelings and emotions, which you can do in private counseling sessions. Many people find that counseling serves as a healthy outlet that helps them battle their emotions without taking stress out on their kids.

Seek Comfort 
Living in a broken home doesn’t mean that you or your kids are broken people. Now is the time that you should reach out and comfort each other. This might be as simple as giving your children a safe and loving environment, or you might find yourself trying to make things as normal as possible.

Alexander Schure, attorney at law and other qualified attorneys can give you advice about what to do in court and how to protect your finances, but your lawyer can’t help you at home. Some divorced partners find that sitting down to a meal together, reading to their kids at night before bed and doing fun activities on the weekends can help their kids feel better about the situation, which in turn, helps them feel better as well.

Earnest Parenting: help for parents facing divorce.