(Editor’s note: Today’s guest post is courtesy of Tracy Hall, who explains how the Love and Logic technique can help with autistic children. Thanks Tracy!!)
As parents, we all have a tough time deciding on what types of discipline we will use for our children. We want our children to feel loved, but we also want them to grow up with respect for others and as well behaved as we can manage. This can be something that is seriously challenging when you have a normal everyday child, but when you have a child who has been diagnosed with Autism, you have an even bigger challenge in front of you. So, what do you do when everything you have tried has failed?
Remember that many times autistic children don’t understand that they have done something wrong, no matter how many times that you have told them they are misbehaving. Something in their very confused brain just isn’t connecting between right and wrong. This will not be for every wrong doing, in fact, most autistic children have certain areas where they have these problems. Being able to identify these areas is going to be a hard step, but something that will help you both in times to come.
I have found that the use of “Love and Logic” works wonderful with autistic children. They are capable of making choices and this is what love and logic is all about. Instead of telling your child, “If you spit that drink out again I am taking it away”, you say something like “Won’t it be sad that you won’t have your drink if you chose to spit it out.” Believe it or not, the simple changing of how you word your sentences can make a lot more sense to them.
Not only does love and logic work well for discipline, but it also helps your child grow up to make the right decisions when you are not around. Simple wording like this can make your child understand so many other things as they get older. My autistic son can now make the decision to save money because of love and logic. Before, he would get a quarter and spend it right away. Now we say to him, “If you save your quarter then once you get three more you will have a whole dollar and can get something bigger!” He now waits till he has five dollars so he can get something nice.
Remember that your child having autism does not mean that they can’t understand anything. They just understand things differently than a lot of other children. Many times if you will try your best to listen to them you can understand more than you thought you could. If your child has communication problems, try sign language. Autistic kids take very well to simple signs and it will make things a lot easier on you and them both.
Tracy Hall is a guest writer and blogger for Viamedic.com, a safe U.S. medication facilitator with over 12 years of pharmaceutical experience. You can read more about Viamedic & their customer milestone of more than 1.5 million orders processed on PRweb.com.
Image courtesy of Lance Neilson via Creative Commons license, some rights reserved.
Earnest Parenting: help for parents of autistic children.
This an amazing post about disciplining a child. I like how you wrote about the difference between two ways of saying the same thing. By saying, ” Wouldn’t it be sad if you lost your drink if you chose to spit it out,” places a sense of ownership on the child. It makes everything a choice for them to do the right thing. Thanks for the information!
Excellent article. I think the fundamental part of getting along with young children is talking to them the right way.